We all know someone who at every opportunity will always try to one-up whatever you say ..”That’s nothing, I began coding by the time I was 3.” It’s easy to come off as arrogant. Perception is everything.

If you seem arrogant, you’ll alienate people. There seems to be a very fine line between coming across as arrogant or coming across as confident.

Yes, arrogant people are confident, but with a seemingly different root cause, perhaps financial privilege or having been the center of attention. There are two main factors that contribute to being confident: self-efficacy and self-esteem.

The key being that confident people have qualities that everyone admires, and does not come across as a Class-A jerk that people would rather avoid.

Here are some tips to

  1. Confident people aren’t name droppers.
  2. Confident people are interested in others
  3. Confident people make eye contact, making you feel important.
  4. Confident people are quick to apologize when they are off schedule or running late.Their know that their time is not more important than anybody else’s
  5. Confident people are inquisitive and ask questions
  6. Confident people don’t profess to have all the answers.”I don’t know the answer, but I’ll find out”
  7. Confident people do not interrupt conversations.They actively listen to you.
  8. Confident people don’t feel the need to bad mouth others
  9. Confident people are not condescending when speaking to others, they do not put down others.They don’t cross the line.
  10. Confident people admit their mistakes and learn from their experiences and don’t pass the buck.
  11. Confident people look the part. Their body language is open and not intimidating. They don’t point fingers, they don’t wave other’s off ,
  12. Confident people speak assertively. No “ummms” and “ahhhs
  13. Confident people keep an open mind
  14. Confident people relish achievement and contributing their talents to the world
  15. Confident people don’t feel threatened by others’ successes
  16. Confident people don’t feel the need to brag. Their accomplishments do it for them.
  17. Confident people enjoy what they have without defining themselves by their possessions.
  18. Confident people define their core values in the face of adversity and are not ostentatious,
  19. Confident people are not ruthless or manipulative exhibit callous behavior
  20. Confident people take responsibility for their choices.

Confidence can show in many ways: your behavior, your body language, how you speak, what you say, etc. Take the high road so as not to get the proverbial eye roll from co-workers.

Be confident, be secure and project it out to the world. 

I invite you to share your  experiences or thoughts, or comments. You can Email or call me for more information on soft skills/interpersonal skills workshops that can transform employees.